Ninth Rocket Jump

[unlessitsafarm]

JUST WHAT IN THE SAM HILL IS GOING ON NOW?

Someone make me a rib sandwich! I cannot rage on an empty stomach!

Let me tell you a story, Mayfield. A story about MY father! My father was a man who was a righteous pillar of masculine identity! He was strong! Disciplined! Gentle to the women! Firm with the women when they yammered on too long about needing an electric oven! And he taught me a VERY important lesson!

You wanna know what that lesson is, Mayfield?

Spare the rod, spoil the child. Do I LOOK spoiled to you? I most certainly do NOT you pack of worthless mongrels! MAYBE A LITTLE DISCIPLINE SHOULD BE INSERTED INTO WHERE YOUR SPINES SHOULD BE SO YOU DON'T LOSE YOUR GODDAMNED MINDS EVERY TIME SOMETHING HAPPENS IN THIS SHITHOLE LIE OF A TOWN!

AND WHERE THE HELL IS MY RIB SANDWICH!

[[ Be sure to check here and help me make sure I didn't forget anyone, orz ]]

Comments

[armywithcountry.livejournal.com]

[Oh, Prussia likes you already.]

Damn straight! Weaklings here start whining at the drop of a pin! In my army, anyone sheds a tear, we beat him until he doesn't have any strength left to even think about crying!

[unless-itsafarm.livejournal.com]

That's the way MEN solve problems, damnit! There's not enough violence in the lives of these people!

[armywithcountry.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha! Couldn't have said it better myself! Only way to get stronger is through attack! These people need to learn what real pain feels like!

[unless-itsafarm.livejournal.com]

I like the way you think, soldier. You got a name, son?

[armywithcountry.livejournal.com]

I'm the awesome Kingdom of Prussia! And don't call me son, I'm way older than you.

[unless-itsafarm.livejournal.com]

... Oh. You're one of them loonies that thinks you're a country.

[armywithcountry.livejournal.com]

Hey, we're not crazy! Well, other than England. And Russia's getting there. And Hungary's just fucking weird. But I'm not! And I'm way stronger than any of them, anyway!

[unless-itsafarm.livejournal.com]

That so? Just how strong are you, then?

[armywithcountry.livejournal.com]

Awesomely strong. Greatest power in Europe! Russia doesn't count, he's just fat.

[unless-itsafarm.livejournal.com]

Where I come from, Prussia is dissolved.

[armywithcountry.livejournal.com]

Wow, your world must really suck, then. Because I'm never getting dissolved! Stronger than ever, in fact!

[unless-itsafarm.livejournal.com]

I LIKE that attitude, ha ha! NEVER SURRENDER!